Hump what?

As of yet, I have nothing to do today.  I’ve been here forty-five minutes, had one bottle of juice, one cup of coffee, and one wardrobe malfunction.

 

There’s this one carpenter who’s sort of . . . shall we say. . .  a goofball.  For instance:  He’s just recently shaved off his horseshoe mustache (like a goatee with it’s chin shaven?) which he kept for a few months for shits.  Like the kind you’d expect to be accompanied by a full-fledged, greasy mullet.   But it’s not.  He’s a relatively normal, quite nice, could be considered handsome guy.  He’s also, like many people in this city, surprisingly (okay, not that suprising) outdoors-y.  To that regard, he has odd (odd to me, but probably not to the suprising many) sorts of items one wouldn’t normally expect to find (that is the definition of odd, right?) in say. . . an office cabinet.  Like a large, iron, something they’d replicate in a cartoon, scary-looking bear trap.  Which he pretended to arm in bossman’s office for a week.  So T taped shut his cabinet lest he set the ulna-shattering trap into action.  About a week later, J (oh yeah, I didn’t say his name yet—that’s the now-sort-of-slightly-un-shaven carpenter) went in there and pretended to have set off the totally defunct and antique bear trap.  (which he’d already told me was harmless).  Funny.   Anyways.  The point is this:

 

He asked me today if it was a fashion statement, or if there was a rip in my pants.

 

I had to verify with the receptionist that you could, in fact, see my neon green striped underwear through the hole in the back zipper of my pants.   Sweet.    Wish I could’ve at least used that excuse to go home for an hour or so—had some jeans in the car.  Damn.

What a Coinky-dink

I was going to post about the lovely hazards of driving while on a cell phone as California has stepped up the plate and will ban said activity. When does it take effect? JULY 2008! What are we too stupid to figure it out for another 2 years? or is it that we're so hyper connected to our agents, managers, studios and gazillion superficial-what-can-you-do-for-me friends that we'll have to ween ourselves from the handheld phone to bluetooth super technology?
Seriously. 2 years! My favorite quote in the article was from some pissed off Republican lawmakers who criticized the bill as "nanny government." and says:

"What's next -- helmets while you're riding a horse? Airbags in the bathtub?"

I'm sorry, do we endanger people when sitting in our bathtubs? Do horse riding individuals frequently cause major accidents?? And don't most professional horse riders/jumpers actually already wear helmets?

I mean seriously.
ps. so sad about the glasses, but i did love the recommendations regarding cell use.

Actual Safety Tips: "Cell-dom use the phone while driving"

So, at my job (where we deal with construction) we have the most fastidious safety consultant. Because of his knowledge and expertise our work sites are up to OSHA safety standards, all of our employees are safer, and we’re well equipped to deal with emergency or dangerous situations as they arise. His company also sends a weekly newsletter including the Safety Tip of The Week. Each Monday, this two or three page document thoroughly discusses the intricacies of one topic (Carpal Tunnel Warning Signs, Water Safety, Don’t drink and Walk (seriously)). This week was Cell Phone Safety. He discusses the dangers of talking on a hand-held phone while driving (which I think should be illegal everywhere), and then has some tips to follow if you DO have to use the phone. Here’s my favorite:

5. Do not make emotional phone calls while driving (quitting
your job, breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, etc.) as you will be
focused primarily on the call rather than your driving.

I picture the scenario as going something like this (inner monologue)

“. . . milk, catfood, ziplock bags, go get a haircut. . .what else? Oh, I might as well call John and dump him while I’m out and about.”

Just strikes me as funny, as things are wont to do.

On a different note, check out my Stupid Glasses: